There are things we can only learn from experience but in my experience, we can save ourselves a few heartaches with some simple mindset shifts.<\/p>\n
If you\u2019ve been following me for a while, you know I\u2019ve been open and candid about my struggles with insecurities. Some of them were about my physical appearance, sure, but the root cause was always about not feeling good enough.<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t lack confidence to the point of paralysis. I had enough to function and even create the illusion of someone who had their life together, but the reality was that I was playing small.<\/p>\n
With a few exceptions, a lot of the choices over the years were about minimising the risk of getting rejected. What\u2019s wrong with that you might ask? Well, it depends.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s not great in the personal arena when you chose a romantic partner that\u2019s definitely not someone who shares your values because you don\u2019t think you can \u201cdo better\u201d. Or when you\u2019re staying in an unfulfilling relationship, because again, you convince yourself that it\u2019s normal, when really you don\u2019t believe that you are not good enough to have the kind of relationship you would LOVE to be in.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s an issue when you apply for jobs your totally overqualified for because you don\u2019t think that you would be considered for something more challenging. Or an even worst scenario, what if they hire for a job you were really excited about? You know the right mix between a role where you talents would shine and where you would continue to grow. But hang on, why would that be a problem? When you lack confidence, the type of role I just described can be terrifying because what if you\u2019re not able to perform? What if you\u2019re not good at it or what if you can\u2019t keep up with the challenges aka growth part of it? Yep, impostor syndrome anyone?<\/p>\n
I can go on and on about how my lack confidence had an impact on my life but I think you get the idea.<\/p>\n
Becoming confident didn't happen overnight (very few things do!), but there is one thing I wish I had known sooner.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a very simple mindset shift\u2026but as most of know, simple doesn\u2019t necessarily mean easy.<\/p>\n
Being GENUINELY confident does not mean having no self-doubt. It doesn\u2019t mean that we our thoughts are always positive. It's not about becoming immune to fear...or never feeling insecure again.<\/p>\n
Even the most confident, successful, high performance person will have their moments of doubt<\/strong>. It doesn\u2019t mean that they are frauds. It just means that there are human.<\/p>\n The moment I truly embraced this notion, so much of the pressure I used to feel vanished. I found myself being much more open to stepping out of my comfort zone. I felt more comfortable just BEING myself, allowing myself to be seen. And guess what? It had a positive impact on every area of my life. From friendships, to work, to my yoga practice (it\u2019s hard to learn new postures when you\u2019re too busy worrying about not being as good as other yogis next to you), I couldn\u2019t believe it!<\/p>\n So, my invitation to you is to examine your self-talk when going through challenging times. Are you judging yourself for not being able to stay positive? For feeling low?<\/p>\n