Fadela Hilali

Is your age holding you back?

age holding you back

Does thinking about your age feel daunting or demoralising?

I personally started having issues around that in my early twenties.

I felt under a lot of pressure to make the right career choices, have the perfect body before it was too late,  find the right relationship that would eventually turn into a family later on life and so on.

Looking back, I realise that the constant worry about the future and the pressure I was putting on myself robbed me from countless opportunities to enjoy what life had to offer then and there.

I’ve done a lot of work to let go of that way of thinking and I am all the better for it.

But full disclosure, old insecurities still sneak up on me occasionally, but I’m able to handle them swiftly.

Over my years of coaching, I have come across a LOT of limiting beliefs around age. Here is a little best of:

✅I should have my career/finances figured out by now.

👤I’m going to end up old and alone.

⏱My clock is ticking, what if I miss my chance at having a family.

👀The older I get, the harder it will be to find love

⏳I’m running out of time/I’m running behind.

If any of these resonate with you, I get it.

We all have limiting beliefs, stories we tell ourselves that leave us feeling bad and disempowered. These stories limit our ability to take risks and to pursue things that could potentially bring us joy.

So how do we overcome our limiting beliefs around age?

1. Acknowledge them: There is a lot of shame around the fear of ageing. The mere act of recognising them takes a lot of the pressure off. We ALL have insecurities. Pretending otherwise will not only amplify them but also add shame to the mix.

2. Ask what purpose they served so far? Maybe having that belief was an attempt at protecting yourself from getting hurt. It’s weird, but sometimes it’s easier to wish we had done something than to handle the disappointment of trying and failing.

3. Adopt a new belief: think of a belief that you rather have instead, one that would feel more empowering. If we think of the example of finding love, living your life thinking that the relationship train has come and gone is definitely not going to help you meet and let alone connect with someone you like.

Whether it’s in life, love or work, you can use this process to let go of any belief that has been holding you back.

It’s time to grant yourself permission to live fully and wholeheartedly.


If you would like support on journey, I offer 1-2-1 coaching as well as an online group experience, The Confidence Bootcamp. Book your free discovery session today!